speeding ticket anticipated~

I have taken the liberty of drafting the response to the most likely forthcoming speeding ticket:

Dear ASX,
cc ASIC.

In anticipation of your request for an explanation of AQC's recent increase in shareprice and volatility please note that AQC is as volatile as a unattended fire hose turned on full bore with not enough liquidity to slake the thirst of a gnat.

You can typically drive the price 10% either direction for an investment of under $20,000- not that anyone would be interested in upticking or downticking here.

If we were engaged in negotiating a material transaction we would have disclosed it already if we thought we had to and providing our dog or its lawyer didn't eat the announcement first. Since the usual suspects from AFR Street Talk are not around to conspire to breach contracts and violate securities laws then why worry about anything leaking? We did asked around a bit and no-one we asked (and we did ask one or two insiders) said they were insider trading.

So at risk of being cliche in adopting the customary response: Stop worrying, everything's fine and please go away.....