Dear shareholder,The Directors would like me to release this...

Dear shareholder,
The Directors would like me to release this today, the 20th of January
"yep, we directors know that it's been a monumental stuff up but when you are dealing with monumental stuff ups and we too are monumental stuff ups then you will understand. AEC were so convincing and paid for a beaut steak and Grange down at the Union Club. So we can't help it if we believed in Santa. No sweat as they are lining up alternatives and within two years we'll have another offer from a potential stuff up.
Oh, by the way, we are having a capital raising and this whole disaster has cost us $10m but, hey, we were just kidding anyway"
Dustine Pang
Company Secretary.
Poor Dustine gets all the beaut jobs.
Oh, I am joking here with this letter and I am very confident that Monday will be happy day...well, aren't you?